Travel on Over!!

Helloooooo..... (I picture this echoing like it a dark cave) because I am sure thats where all of you are thinking I have gone. But actually I am still alive, barely. And I am starting a new blog! I never really felt like I hit my stride over here. I love you all and I really really want you to come on over but I will tell you it is a little different over there. I will still be making fun of myself and talking about life in general but I will mostly be talking about what I really love... making a fool of myself when I travel. I somehow managed to convince my company to tranfer me to Singapore so I will be sharing a lot about the move to South East Asia (actually feels like moving home) and a lot about travel tips and antics. I will also talk a lot about past travels and how to dry your hair under a hand dryer and curl your hair with tree vines. (for real) So please follow me to coachclassandsass.blogspot.com Coach Class and Sass (my hyperlink thingy isnt working very well today). Cheesy title I know but it pretty much sums me up. I travel affordable and I am always sassy. Jimmy's grandma always tells me she is "short fat and sassy" whenever I ask her how she is doing and I just love that word "sassy." It means so many things. I will also be guest posting over at Lovestitched (www.lovestitched.com) and I am really excited/nervous about it. So come show me support over there too if you can. LOVE YA!!

Penis Wrinkle, Cancer, and strippers... Welcome to Liz Taylor's blog.

HI to anyone who came over from my 5-7-9 pee post on MODG blog today. Yes my name really is Liz Taylor, it's actually Lisbeth Taylor. It was Lisbeth Hinkel but when I got married I happily shortened to Liz because I work in sales and people remembered Liz Taylor way more. Except for the mean kids in elementary who probably remember my old name because they called me Lisbeth Hinkel Penis wrinkle all through my nerdy elementary years. Bitches. Actually looking back now that is pretty witty for a 4th grader, but it still stings.

Anyway, the last few blogs on here are seriously lacking and I apologize for that. I had cancer. That's my excuse for everything. It was just thyroid cancer and it was gone before I knew I had it but the whole ordeal sucked the humor right out of me. If you decide to go a little further back thought there are some interesting commentary on the wizard of Oz, rental car places, and stupid men in gym shorts who criticized my outfit one day. I should have punched him. Actually it's not that interesting it was just me ranting, but hey I had fun.

If you decide to join and follow me I am planning on getting up and running again soon, as soon as I finish my seasons of salute your shorts and Pete and Pete. Yes, that is my summer goal. Stick around awhile and learn from the reigning Liz Taylor. I have some great new insights into the world of my clients too. Like when I emailed one today on a Friday at noon and he replied with "not now I am trying to get drunk and look at some hot ass." note to self: don't email this client on a Friday afternoon because he is at the strip club. night night new friends!

to anyone who still actually reads this from time to time

To all my 19 amazing readers, remember when I said I was going to get better about blogging? Remember when I had my goal sheets and to do lists and was so confident I would complete the tasks? I lied.

Not intentionally but real life got in the way of my goals and once again I feel like I am sooooo ridiculously behind on everything that it is just depressing and the fact that I cant think of anything to ever blog about anymore is depressing. So until I can get my life sorted out and back on track I am going to officially put this blog on hold because feeling like I am not blogging enough feels like one more thing I am not checking off my list, so I am just removing it from the list all together... for now. Yes, the weeks and months of not posting were a hiatus also, just a lazy and unofficial one. Now it is official, because it is in writing or some crap like that.

I Love you all and I will be back in months to come, full of life and optimism with a whole new goal sheet that I may or may not finish.

3 day quarantine

I wish I could say I was going to be on vacation for three days but I still have to work, just from home. WHich is a lot better than having to go the office but for the next three days I will be stuck at home with absolutely no human contact. In fact, no one can come within 6 feet of me because I will be radioactive. I offered to just fly to Japan and back but my doctor didnt find that very funny. I will be taking the radioactive iodine pill I-131 to knock out any remaining cancer and thyroid tissue left in my bosy. Then they will scan me next week to make sure they got it all. I get ot have a whole three days using only disposable dishware and my hubby has to sleep upstairs. I actually already make him do this because the poor thing snores like a freight train. I am seriously not exagerrating it is the loudest snore I have ever heard in my life. You can stand at the bottom of the stairs with the door shut and still hear him. Anyway, that's besides the point, you will be able tto see me from space! ok, maybe not from space but I watched a show once where the military tracked a guy from a very small dose of radioactive material that was in medicine treating a heart condition. So I think if I am so radioactive I cant be around people they could definitely track me. Good thing I'm not a spy. ANyway, I will be cooped up for the next 3 days starting this evening so I'm sure I will get caught up on the fun blog posts rather than these boring ones I've been giving ya'll. peace out! I'm going to go see if I glow in the dark.

She's alive!

So it came out and I survived however I looked like Frankenstein for awhile and still kinda do. I thought it was going to be this small little incision that no one could hardly see and I got this!

Please forgive the verticle angle, I tried rotating this picture every single way I knew how and no matter what I do it keeps posting like this. But trust me when I said this was actually the best the incision looked for about 3 weeks. Picture this with intense bruising and swelling after about 4 days. It was seriously gross. It's not so bad now and at least it was still scarf weather till the last week or so.

We all remember that I basically made the decision to take this thing out. the doctors were perfectly content leaving me and my fat neck filled with a huge thyroid alone. Turns out I am soooo glad I had it taken out because it was Cancer! I still cant believe it. I had cancer and didn't even know it. Crazy. But I have done enough research on thyroid stuff to know that it is nothing to be scared of. They had already removed all of it by the time we even found out it was cancerous and it never spreads. My doctor said in 30 years he has never seen thyroid cancer spread anywhere beyond the thyroid. So if I had to pick a cancer this would be the one to choose. The only thing that sucks now is that I am off my medicine for 6 weeks so they can do a full scan to make sure they got it all. Which means I am tired (like ridiculously tired), anxious, depressed, and put back on 5 pounds. I just sound like a joy to be around right now dont I! But I try to make myself realize it's not me it's the medicine, or lack thereof. But at least it is gone and in 2 weeks I can be back in full swing!

On the moving front, we are still working at it. We found out that we could get all the way there and then have Jimmy denied for his work visa, which seems a little risky. So if the English school says they will let him teach either for cash or part time on a spouse visa then we might be ok, but otherwise we aren't exactly sure how that will work out. DO we take the risk or go somewhere we know will take him. Our other option is teaching in Indonesia where they will be fine with just his associate's degree. Which is fine with me except Indonesian is a little less useful to learn than chinese. Either way we are still plugging away. I'l keep you posted.

I promise to post more fun stuff soon. I have been pretty boring lately, and worked has kept me swamped. But I've got some fun stuff up my sleeve!

it's coming out!! the gland that ruined my life has come to an end!

Hey friends,

More exciting stuff going on!!! I am having my thyroid removed!! The whole thing gone! While this may sound scary to most and I am definitely not looking forward to going under the knife I am totally excited to not have this gigantic golf ball size cyst in my neck either. I am already going to have to be on meds the rest of my life so there is really no point to keeping it. I have no sentimental attachment in fact I think I might request to keep it and hang it on my wall and throw darts at it because seriously my thyroid and I have not had a happy last few years together. Good riddance. (and I will not really be requesting it because that would be gross and smelly and I dont like seeing things outside of my body that are supposed to be inside, even when I am glas they are gone.) Anyway, I go under Thursday morning so say a little prayer for me and hopefully this will help me stabilize my metabolism a little easier. So 30 pounds down and working on the rest by the time we move overseas. After this I will at least be able to wear normal sized necklaces instead of feeling like I have a neck like Mickey Rourke or even worse Ronnie from Jersey shore! (gosh that show is addicting). By the way I also have another new addiction, Pretzel M&M'a (150 cals for a whole freaking pack that lasts me like a day!) and Hallmark movie channel. I will elaborate on this later. While the world was freezing over this weekend I stayed in bed and watched every former full house or growing pains star in really poorly written films all weekend. It was AWESOME! be jealous and be ready for movie reviews.

Extra Extra update

If you got to read the post yesterday before I took it down then you know the whole story of us moving overseas. But apparently I need to clarify a few things after an email or two i received. Yes, I do realize that it is illegal to preach in some of the countries I mentioned we are thinking about going. I also stated that I have no desire to preach or evangelize. Truthfully I really don't. I dont believe that is what I am called to do. I believe the face of missions is changing and I don't have to go grab a soap box and stand in the middle of a busy street or live in a mud hut in the jungle to be a part of missions. I listened to a sermon last week where a member of the Oakland A's considers himself a missionary because of his faith and the example he tries to set for his team. You do not have to be a traditional "missionary" with a world wide organization to be a missionary. (man, that term stirs up a lot of trouble doesn't it). We are not going as "missionaries" either it is just something we also have an interest in because of our faith. My husband and I are going independently. We want to teach English, work in a non-profit, or someday start our own business but I have no desire to witness to the world. Now I realize that this statement will also probably bring criticism from some of my Christian friends. I have a heart to share my faith, but not through an intentional meeting at a coffee shop to save some one's soul. Some people are called to do that and that is their strength and I seriously seriously admire that (Ive even gone through Evangelism Explosion myself), but it isn't me. I have a heart to support those believers in a developing area so that they may go out and share their faith if they feel so called. That is what I am good at. That is how God made me. So nothing illegal in that. Seriously, it is the same thing I would do if we were moving to Washington DC or San Francisco (also possibilities actually). I actually have a hard time with the thought of going in "under cover."

There is a pastor in Dallas who had a heart for Vietnam, a very closed country when it comes to church planting from what I understand. He went straight to the government and said we want to bring your kids to Texas and we want to bring ours here in a sort of exchange program and we want to help with development in a lot of other areas too. We think it will be great for both sides and by the way we are a church and we will most likely preach to you and your kids. (well, I'm sure they didn't say it just like that, I'm paraphrasing). You know what happened, the government let them right in and develop a great program. They have 8 trips going this year! EIGHT! all in plain sight. that's awesome! (this pastor has also done amazing things in his community to bring cultures and religions together for a better understanding of one another, I'll do another post on it someday). Anyway, I subscribe more to his method.

Also, no location for us has been set yet. There are possibilities and options but nothing is set in stone. We will go wherever God takes us. Do we have an inkling of direction at this point, yes, but only because of possibly opportunities in those areas. We still have a long way to go. I would still LOVE an opportunity to work in a business capacity, or for a non-profit. I do not intend to get kicked out of a country or bible beat anyone into believing the way I do. That's not what I am all about. It isn't what my husband is about either. Our strengths lie in openness to communicate and share that we are not perfect but we follow God and it isn't even about "what I am all about" but it is about what God is all about. He made me with a heart to support and not to preach and there is nothing wrong with that.

Ok, well I know that was vague but I hope it cleared a few things up about our intentions in going overseas. This step is just a step forward to change. A step in realizing I don't have to work in a fancy job downtown with my stilettos. I can be just as successful making no money teaching English in a foreign country, and most likely a lot happier. It is about my husband and I depending on one another and having an adventure. it is one step closer to my goal of one day owning my own company in a foreign country. It is a risk, but a risk we feel like we need to take.